Monday, December 19, 2011

Reverence? Respect? Really?

Ephesians 5:22-33 talks about husband and wives but I want to zero in on the last part of verse 33 – on wives because the Lord has been talking to me about respecting my husband and how that relates to my worship on Sunday’s at church.

Ephesians 5:22-33
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.  In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.  After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

I use Strong’s Concordance and here’s what I found.
(respect)    to reverence, venerate, to treat with deference or reverential obedience
Then I went to the dictionary.
definition of reverence - Regard or treat with deep respect.
Definition of respect - A feeling of deep admiration for someone
Definition of admiration - Respect and warm approval

So ladies, we are to treat our husbands with deep respect have a feeling (and I believe show the feeling) of deep admiration. Our men stand taller when we do this and I know I get a benefit of being the woman on his arm, the one he likes to show off, the one he loves coming home to.

Now let me ask you, when you talk to a coworker, a person at church, even to yourself…..what do you say about your husband? Do you complain that he isn’t listening to God, that he doesn’t take the trash out, that he is stupid or lazy? Do you realize you are speaking death into your husband’s life as well as your marriage? Do you speak to your husband this way? Do you tear him down, play Holy Ghost, Jr?

In this context, I found Colossians 3:22 and the word ‘slaves’ very interesting because of the reverence slaves (believers) are supposed to have for Christ.

Colossians 3:22 
Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to win their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord.
Greek for slaves -  sadoúlos ("bond-slave") is used with the highest dignity in the NT – namely, of believers who willingly live under Christ's authority as His devoted followers.

That would be us, those that have accepted the Lord as our Savior. What are ‘slaves’ to do? ‘reverence the Lord’!

So let me ask you, when you go to church and shout out ‘Amen’ or nudge your husband in the side because you think he needs to ‘get’ what the preacher said or you just basically close yourself off because you just know it’s your husband that has the problem……do you see where I’m going?
If we are to ‘respect – reverence’ our husbands and we are to ‘reverence’ God, yet we are walking a day here and there disrespecting our husband,  do you think that reflects on God? Do you think the full power of God will fall on you as you worship? You have unbelief, un-forgiveness, and maybe even anger at your spouse. I wonder if we only see half of what God wants to do because we are not walking as ‘one’ with our spouse?

One more Scripture and then I’ll close.
I always thought I Peter 3:1 meant husbands that were not saved, well check this out!
I Peter 3:1
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

Ladies, look what ‘obey not’ means in the Greek!

Obey not -  Greek meaning –   are disobedient, rebel

Then look at ‘conversation’!

Conversation – greek meaning –   behavior, manner of life

It may be an unsaved rebel of a husband OR it could be a saved but disobedient husband, one that ‘you’ feel isn’t doing it right. And even if he isn’t doing it ‘right’, it is commanded by God, that your behavior, your manner of life (which includes what you speak as well as your attitude) will win them over.

On Sunday there were two things that happened and I believe one was a lesson, an encouragement and the other one was a correction.
First, we are fostering a dog and we’ve only had him a few days. My husband was leaving for work and I had just prayed over him. Well, he opens the door to leave and out goes the dog, man is he fast – down the road he goes and out the door I go screaming his name running after him until I see he is way down the road by now. I turn and look at my husband and my flesh wanted to scream at him and blame him for not being careful. But I heard the Lord speak to me and the Spirit took over and I kept my mouth shut (that is a miracle from years ago, just ask my husband….okay maybe months ago) but anyway, I knew it was not his fault that I could have had a leash on the dog before opening the door, etc. So I stopped and said a short but to the point prayer and thanked God for His faithfulness. I kissed my husband bye, told him I loved him, went in picked up my keys and a leash, and proceeded to drive down the street. God answered my prayer, the dog had turned around and heading back to our home, so about ¼ of a block down he had stopped. I got out of the car, sat on the side of the road and called to him. He came running to me, let me put the leash on him, jumped in the car and off we went. If I would have let my mouth and flesh scream earlier and had not prayed, it could have been awful. I’m so thankful I did not mess up my husband’s day and with that, my day was awesome too.

The second thing is something I’m working on and I admit with great difficulty.  The Lord asked me, while I was mindlessly watching a show, is it honoring, and are you respecting your husband when you have an area that needs cleaned up and it’s still a mess when your husband gets home?  Ouch. It’s not like some BIG project, it’s a small stack of papers on the floor I’ve been meaning to go through or maybe a sink of dishes and you know what it is in your home. There are times I will tell my husband I will do this and that but when he comes home I have spent too much time watching Netflix or being on Facebook or just being lazy. Now there is nothing wrong with any of those things, in moderation. But when it’s 9 hours later and I did not get those one or two things accomplished – not good.  So that is what the Lord has been speaking to me and I’m happy to say those papers are not on the floor they are now filed away or in the trash where they belong! Now about those dishes !!!!!  Oh wait, I had to get this blog finished….right??!!


  1. thank you for sharing and for linking to Thursday Favorite Things blog Hop at Katherines Corner. Hugs!

  2. Christena, this post hit home. 1 Peter 3:1 was quoted to me under very strange circumstances before I even met my husband. He refuses to attend church services, and I pray, a lot for his conversion. However, I took 1 Peter 3:1 to heart, and try to offer a good example rather than a spew of pushy, unchristian words. Your post touched my heart - and my conscious. Thank you for sharing.

  3. Thank you for your comment, Cecilia. I enjoy hearing how the Lord is moving. Sometimes I have no idea why I'm posting something, then I get a reply like yours. May this be the year your husband comes to the Lord!!